Contrary to popular belief, there is no one size fits all here. What works for one person won't necessarily work for the next, so the most important thing you can do is give yourself time to figure out what works best for you. 

What might be helpful is once you've found what works for you, starting off small with just ten minutes say at a time, begin to make space in your daily or weekly routine that's solely for your self care. Don't put too much pressure on yourself by thinking you need to be able to do it all. Some times the best self care is actively accepting that you are doing you're best, whatever that looks like, and that's okay! You can't do and be everything for everyone all of the time.

Below I've listed some things you could try if you don't quite know where to begin:

• Journaling- It's an easy one to overlook, but sometimes simply being able to get our thoughts out on to paper can help us make sense of our experiencing and our own intrusive thoughts. It helps to strengthen the connection between our thoughts and feelings. You can do this as often or as little as you like, and could include the practice of letter writing. If you are struggling with a break up for example, writing a letter never to be sent could help you find some closure. What you do with the letter once you've written it is completely up to you, it could go in the bin, be burnt or ripped up, but this is a helpful technique when you can't really say what's really on your mind.
• Exercise- It doesn't matter really how you choose to do it, and you may feel reluctant to try, but exercise is proven to reduce anxiety and depression. There is a strong connection between the body and the mind, and we can store negative energy within our body. Exercise is a great way for the body to work through excessive anxious energy and release endorphins, providing us with a feel good factor from these neurotransmitters. Don't feel like leaving the house? Why not try searching for youtubers such as 'Growwithjo', who release short and simple exercise routines ton follow at home!
• Affirmations- Practicing daily affirmations can seem daunting at first, but making this part of your daily routine helps by firing up neural pathways, that activate the reward centres in your brain. Simply start with a few positive affirmations each morning, such as 'I am worthy', 'I am enough', 'I believe in myself'. Affirmations are a great way to practice gratitude and encourage self confidence and self esteem.
• Sleep- Getting in to a regular sleep routine can improve our general well being as well as improve our mental well being, REM sleep is vital for brains processing of emotional information. Breathing exercises, meditation and relaxing activities before you go to sleep can really help alongside the usual sleep hygiene practices.
• Set realistic and achievable goals- This will vary from person to person, so it's important to avoid comparing your journey to others. Start off small and work your way to a place that feels comfortable. Remembering to be kind to yourself and honour your progress along the way! On tough days you could start by taking a shower, or making the bed, and work up to tackling your to do list over time. The size of the goal doesn't matter, but achieving something small each day can really help when we are feeling stuck and weighed down, and leave us with a sense of achievement.
• Connect- If you have a support network, whatever this may look like, reach out to them. What you share with others and when is completely up to you, but spending time and connecting with others can reduce feelings of isolation and hopelessness. Whether that be a coffee with friends, spending time with family, or joining a local class. If you don't have a support network, there are befriending organisations available through various charities, check with your local council what may be available for you. Alternatively consider any interests you may have and search for local classes or groups in your area. It may seem daunting at first but getting out there and connecting with others can significantly improve our emotional and mental well being!
• Nature- Getting out of the house and spending time in nature is a great way to improve our overall well being. It can act as a distraction from our negative and unhelpful thoughts, and help us to reconnect with our surroundings again, making our problems feel less all consuming. Through nature we can learn to reconnect and as a result put our negative thoughts in to perspective to better manage the impact on our feelings and behaviour. This is one reason why walk and talk therapy can be helpful, utilising both exercise, nature and connection.
• Mindful meditation- Mindfulness is a powerful tool that has taken off in recent years, and for good reason! It has proven benefits to our well being, as it helps us to stay grounded within the present moment, and learn to let go of the past, whilst accepting the future as it may come. Mindfulness involves purposefully paying attention to the here and now. Connecting with the breath and the sensations within our body, and our surroundings. It's proven to reduce stress and anxiety, and may also improve symptoms of stress-related health conditions. With time and practice, it enhances self-awareness and emotional resilience. There are apps you can download with guided meditations and body mapping, or you could even search for videos on YouTube. Carving out just a little time each day to focus on simply being and reconnecting with yourself is a powerful form of self love and care.
• Healthy, balanced eating- It's easier said than done, but eating a healthy balanced diet ensures your body is getting the nutrition that it needs. Not drinking enough water can have an effect on anxiety levels, and not getting sufficient nutrition can make us feel sluggish and drained. Avoid too much caffeine or alcohol in your diet. It may help to understand what foods effect you differently by keeping a diary of how different foods effect you and your symptoms. Not only will this help you become more mindful of what you're eating, but you may find a connection in the types of foods that negatively impact your emotional well being.
• Learn- Learning a new skill or taking up a hobby can help to provide you with a sense of purpose, as well as boost confidence and self esteem, it's also a chance to connect with others who have similar interests, and acts as a great distraction technique. There are many different courses available online, or you could check in your local area for classes. Whatever works for you, actively taking a step out of your comfort zone to try something new is an act of self care.
• Pamper yourself- You might not feel up to treating yourself if you're struggling with your mental health, but it's time to do something just for you! This isn't selfish, it's essential for your emotional well being. This could be as simple as a face mask, lighting your favourite candle, or moisturising. But doing something just for you reinforces the concept that you as a unique person, matter!
• Seek professional help- If you are struggling, don't be ashamed to reach out for support. You are not alone, and there are many ways you can access support. You're GP can offer advice and guidance, and there are various charitable organisations out there who can offer support. Talking through your problems with a counsellor or therapist can help you to move forward and connect with yourself on a deeper level. Finding the right therapist for you is important, think about what matters to you. You need to know you will be taken seriously, and understood on a deeply empathic level without the fear of judgement. Making the decision to access therapy is a huge step, and so you want to make sure you are beginning on your journey with the right person. I offer a free, informal half an hour chat to all my clients before we begin working together, this is so they can get a real feel for me, and vice versa.